Female sexual pleasure as a site of inequality

It is very difficult to think of sexuality independent of gender roles and norms. In this sense, gender-related inequality, which we witness in many areas of social life, shows itself once again when it comes to sexual practices and pleasures. Especially if we consider heterosexual sexuality, we can still see that the practices that are largely based on male pleasure are dominant.

First of all, the scientific study of the female genitalia and female sexual pleasure is settled in a relatively short period of a long human history. Large-scale quantitative research aimed at understanding human orgasm began to emerge only in the 20th century thanks to the famous sex researches of that era. These studies gradually, albeit partially, lifted the veil of mystery behind women's sexual pleasure. For example, it has been clinically observed as a result of these studies that women may have orgasms with clitoral arousal. However, it is still not possible to this day to say that female orgasm is fully understood. As a matter of fact, we can come across ambiguous or even contradictory arguments on this topic on the Internet, the widest source of information available today. The simplest example of this is shaped around the vaginal orgasm and the G-spot. The presence or the absence of the G-spot still remains largely a question mark in the head. Likewise, being unable to reach the famous vaginal orgasm is still a general concern among women.

These concerns were addressed to a certain extent through studies on the female orgasm. For example, in her famous essay The Myth of the Vaginal Orgasm (1970), the American radical feminist Anne Koedt says that “(w)omen have thus been defined sexually in terms of what pleases men; our own biology has not been properly analyzed. Instead, we are fed with the myth of the liberated woman and her vaginal orgasm –an orgasm which in fact does not exist.” Therefore, Koedt challenges the Freudian theory that considers clitoral orgasms as infantile and immature and highlights that “(a)lthough there are many areas for sexual arousal, there is only one area for sexual climax; that area is the clitoris. All orgasms are extensions of sensation from this area.” In this context, the discovery that the clitoris is anatomically much bigger than it is commonly thought, and that it can be stimulated both externally and internally, has taught us many things. However, the importance attributed to clitoral stimulation and to non-penetrative sexual activity has not yet become widespread, resulting in continuing inequalities in intimate encounters. Accordingly, an orgasm gap still exists between male and female orgasms.

If we take a quick look at the statistical data, we can see this difference more clearly. As a matter of fact, a quantitative study conducted in the US in 2017 shows that 95% of heterosexual men have an orgasm during a sexual intimacy compared to 65% of heterosexual women. Again in the US, according to a research conducted in 2015 among 1055 women aged between 18 and 94, only 18% of women reported that intercourse alone was sufficient to achieve orgasm. Therefore, women need majorly a clitoral stimulation to reach climax. Undoubtedly, these rates may differ by country depending on the level of sexual education. We can assume that the gap is higher in places where there is no sexual education at familial or scholar level and where sexuality continues to be taboo.

What’s interesting is that the clitoris is the only organ in the human body whose sole function is giving sexual pleasure. (Koedt, 1970) However, the penetrative sexual activity remains the basis of heterosexual relationships. This can force women to feel like they have to enjoy the sexual intercourse they are involved in; and this unfortunately makes fake orgasms a common practice among women. According to a study, 67% of women perform fake orgasms, while another study shows that women use vocalization to reinforce a fake orgasm. Although men fake it too, the rates are much lower. Of course, the motivations behind the fake orgasms are diverse, but the most voiced reasons are "satisfying the partner" and "getting done" with it. Therefore, we can say that especially for women, sexual pleasure is still conceived to please someone else rather than oneself.

As a result, despite all these researches and the social transformation, we still have a lot to learn about sexuality and pleasure, particularly female pleasure. In this respect, it should be remembered that actions associated with pleasure in the body have a social as well as physical value. In other words, rather than thinking that inequality is spontaneous, arbitrary and inevitable, we should try to understand the social factors that lead us to think and behave in certain ways in our sexual activity. Maybe this way, hopefully, in the future there will be no one faking orgasms.